For the past few decades, there has been a constant effort to influence women in a certain way which would lead them to major misguidance. Movies depicting women as powerful and smart, when they choose freedom over family. A phenomenal increase in females working and juggling home responsibilities as well. result of these, we can see how the world today suffers from various illnesses – the least of which is depression. Yes, least.

So what’s the problem?

- 

I will dive straight to the point - I am tired of hearing about women empowerment and girl power and feminism. But why don’t I hear much about how Women need to be saved in the hereafter? That hell fire is a bigger concern than worldly matters?

The Prophet (ﷺ) said: > “I was shown the Hell-fire and that the majority of its dwellers were women who were ungrateful.” It was asked, “Do they disbelieve in Allah?” (or are they ungrateful to Allah?) He replied, “They are ungrateful to their husbands and are ungrateful for the favors and the good (charitable deeds) done to them. If you have always been good (benevolent) to one of them and then she sees something in you (not of her liking), she will say, ‘I have never received any good from you.” - Sahih al-Bukhari 29

Although it is also true that women will be more in Jannah as well, since - there are `just more women compared to men. But the first hadith is enough to scare us - is it not? That a major chunk of fuel for the fire will be us - Women?

And in a way, women are responsible for teaching Islam and Deen to their kids. We will punished mostly for what sin? Ingratitude. To their husbands. I would actually even believe it extends their families and friends. But what are we doing about it? Really? And why don’t we worry about it?

Qur’an and Gratitude

Allah commands us in the Qur’an to be grateful!

“Then remember Me; I will remember you. Be grateful to Me, and do not reject Me.” - 2:152

“… and be grateful to Allah, if it is Him you worship.” - 2:172

“What can Allah gain by your punishment, if you are grateful and you believe?…” - 4:147

“And remember! Your Lord caused to be declared (publicly): ‘If you are grateful, I will add more (favours) unto you: but if you show ingratitude, truly My punishment is terrible indeed.” - 14:7

So basically, from these aayat, we understand that gratitude is a very crucial aspect of worship to Allah. That Allah has promised great rewards - with barakah and forgiveness for those slaves who are grateful believers.

And not to forget that we achieve the best outcome with our gratitude - Allah’s pleasure. What can beat that? On the other hand..

Allah declares his rejection for those who reject him.

He expresses his distaste at the disbelieving people’s arrogance which stems from ingratitude.

Being ungrateful is a form of kufr (disbelief) and as Satan promised Allah - “Then I will come upon them from the front and from the rear, and from their right and from their left. And You will not find most of them thankful.’' -  7-17

What did he say? That he will lead us astray with ingratitude! **Love and gratitude. How do they work? **

For the sake of this argument, let’s take the concept of love. When you love someone - you are grateful. For having them, for the good things they do for you, for the way they make you feel, the value they add to your life, for the blessing that it feels like.

But can you imagine loving someone whom you don’t feel grateful for. You cannot appreciate anything about them if you don’t find anything to be thankful about. Rather you would become bitter, angry and even resentful about them because you see nothing good in them.

How can we worship Allah - without experiencing gratitude? It is almost impossible to be in love with Allah and not feel overwhelmed with the good things that he gives, the way he makes you feel or the value he adds in your life with countless blessings! Even if you have one person to love or who loves you - it is a manifestation of Allah’s love. And that love usually begins with your mother. Even before you were born!

Love is gratitude. It is appreciation.

**Why is gratitude such a big deal? **

Ibn Umar reported: The Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings be upon him, said, “The False Messiah will come upon this marsh of Marriqanat. Most of those who go out to him will be women, until a man goes back to his wife, his mother, his daughter, his sister, and his aunt to shackle them tightly, fearing they would go out to him.” - Source: Musnad Aḥmad 5353

If you are aware of what’s going on in the world at the moment wrt women issues - you will begin to appreciate the concern. Muslim women are losing the sense of an Islamic identity due to media, news, propaganda and other forms of brainwashing that are heavily pushed onto the women and young girls. With the amount of focus on the oppression of women by the men, the narrative is that of a skewed worldview where men are painted as the monsters.

“Men are the Qawwaam -protectors and maintainers of women, because Allaah has made one of them to excel the other, and because they spend (to support them) from their means. Therefore the righteous women are devoutly obedient (to Allaah and to their husbands), and guard in the husband’s absence what Allaah orders them to guard (e.g. their chastity and their husband’s property). As to those women on whose part you see ill-conduct, admonish them (first), (next) refuse to share their beds, (and last) beat them (lightly, if it is useful); but if they return to obedience, seek not against them means (of annoyance). Surely, Allaah is Ever Most High, Most Great” Al-Nisa’ 4:34

How can a society prosper where the QAWWAAM - is not respected or even appreciated, especially after being honored by Allah with this status? When women are being taught to hate their men, and disobey them for their rights. Where the stories they’re being told are how the world is their playground and staying at home is a prison. Taking care of themselves and their families is backward and shameful. Working and standing shoulder-to-shoulder with men is the right thing to do. Equal rights for everything!

The whole idea of equality of rights - is making the already emotional women to be misguided by flamed emotions. Allah has made us different, not equal. How can we compare two very different ideas? It is not sensible.

What is the solution?

Education!

1.Learn and teach our children the Qur’an and Sunnah - We need to focus on the recitation, reflection and memorization of Qur’an. When women are focused on this, they will follow the Sunnah of our Prophet better. - **Seeking knowledge is an obligation upon every Muslim. - **Sunan Ibn Mājah224 But this knowledge is first and foremost about the Deen of Allah. About Islam. Especially for women, because they have the most important job of all – raising and training an Ummah. An army of intellectuals with good values. - The Qur’an and Hadith are exhaustive enough for women to be busy for a lifetime – while eliminating a lot of worldly distractions.

2. Teach our children the value and importance of women in Islam
   • When a child sees his mother engaged in worship, doing good deeds and perfecting her character upon the prophet’s path – what do you think the child will learn?
   • This child – regardless of being a boy or a girl will grow up to respect his mother, sisters and other female members of the family and society. Our religion liberates women and gives them high status not just here – but in Jannah as well.
   • You teach children not with words but with your actions. They hear with their eyes.

3. Empower girls and women with Islam for their akhirah, not with feminism for this dunya - If we educate our children about what’s the status of  women in Islam, how powerful they are and what they role they play in contributing to the Ummah they will be proud and confident in their Muslim identity.

• They would never feel threatened by the narrative of the UnIslamic groups where women are truly oppressed. Where revealing the body is considered as freedom and choosing to cover is called backwards.

4.Focus on what’s important - life skills, critical thinking, reasoning and strong mental resolve - We need to teach our girls from a young age on how to be efficient home makers. How to budget, how to spend. The skills needed in being an educated,intellectual, humble and loving women.

- We need to teach them how to think for themselves, form conclusions and judge issues according to the laws of nature. They should be equipped with enough resources to form ideas and explain them coherently. 

This will enable them to have reasonable conversations and relationships in life. And of course, this will eventually build a strong mental fortress where they can act responsibly, with the right information and judge a situation based on the facts. They will be able to have second order thinking and be aware of the consequences of a particular choice.

5. Build a family first attitude - Can you imagine a home where the mother is missing? - Where does all the love and warmth come from? - Can you imagine a home where the father is missing? - Where does all the protection and maintenance come from? - You can speak to anyone with a broken home/ family and record their experience.

They are mentally disturbed and hurt. Either of the parent is very crucial in the upbringing and development of a child. Parents build a home – together. We share the responsibility of taking care of the home – best suited to our nature and ability.

All of the above solutions will not work effectively if either of the parent is missing in their roles. Behind every successful man is a loving woman, and behind every successful woman is a loving man. There’s a lot more we can do to help this matter, but the above five suggestions summarize it enough.

As you can imagine, we cannot save the Ummah if we cannot protect our women.

A child’s first madrasah is in the lap of the mother. We need strong Muslimahs to raise good children, who value the Islamic teachings of Qur’an and Sunnah. Only a good mother can instil and inculcate good values and morals in the children, and maintain harmony in the family.

If she’s loving and obedient to her husband, caring and responsible towards her children, you have a happy family which can contribute to the world and the Ummah. She will constantly be grateful herself, and teach gratitude to her children and family. When you break the fundamental unit of society - by kidnapping the mother from the home, you break the society. It is not the men who are oppressing and torturing women, it is always women first.

The men are taught from a very young age how to behave, how to think, how to treat others – mostly by women around them. Men who have good moral values and commendable characters – were raised by good women. [[Weak relationships with children]]

At the end of the day, no matter where you go, you long to return home. A place of peace, comfort, smiles and happiness. Can you imagine that without a woman?

Why do we not understand the importance of women in building beautiful homes?

Why are we not grateful for what Allah has given us? The comfort and blessings Allah bestows on women are so unique and special compared to men.

Why are we not grateful for the way Allah has gifted us freedom from harsh gruelling work which men do, to maintain their homes? Why are we not grateful for the responsibility Allah has given us to produce and design super human beings? For motherhood, for beauty, for warmth, for intellect, empathy, strength and will-power? Is there anything more amazing than building your own team from scatch? From training them and teaching them the most wonderful emotion ever – love?

And what is love.. if not gratitude?

P.S. Did you know one of Allah’s name is Al-Shakur (Ash-Shakir) ‘the All-Thankful’.The Perfect Appreciator, the One Who Rewards Little With Much

If we are grateful for little, he gives more in return. How beautiful is Our Lord, Subhanallah!

So say a little prayer of thanks, and save our women from the hell fire!